Shikamaru's Agony
by Gaara's Desert Rose657
Summary: "Mother...Father, please forgive me," he said before plunging the knife into the spot where her heart should be. Shikamaru's Agony is revealed. ONESHOT!


_**Disclaimer: I don't own Shikamaru or the song!**_

**I have nothing left to give**

**I have found the perfect end**

**You were made to make it hurt **

**Disappear into the dirt**

Shikamaru sat in the grass watching the clouds roll by overhead; thinking to himself. Why had his life turned out the way it had? He never asked for it to happen nor did he want to face the consequences. He rolled back until he felt his back press against the dirt. He wished he were like the clouds; wafting silently and peacefully on the gentle morning breeze. He closed his eyes and the lurid images of his parents played across his eyelids. He shot up, shaking his head viciously trying to exile the gruesome images. Why…why did it have to happen to him!

**Carry me to heaven's arms**

**Light the way and let me go**

**Take the time to take my breath**

**I will end where I began**

He awoke to find the moon smiling down on him. Images of his mother and fathers laughing faces invaded his eyes and blocking out the shine of the moon; enveloping him in darkness. _Mother…father…I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough. I couldn't save you; but I promise you one thing. I will find your killer and I will avenge you. _He sat up and headed towards the village. She is out there somewhere and he was going to find her; even if it kills him.

**And I will find the enemy within**

**Because I can feel it crawl beneath my skin**

**Dear Agony**

**Just let go of me**

**Suffer slowly**

**Is this the way it's got to be?**

**Dear Agony**

Shikamaru reached the village perimeter and kept walking. All the way people stared. He heard their soft accusing murmurs from every direction.

"Look it's that boy," a woman said, pointing in his direction.

"The one who murdered his family?" another girl asked. The first nodded. He stopped listening to them. _I didn't do it._ He kept walking.

"Hey look, it's the kid that killed his family," said a burly man. _I didn't do it!_ Shikamaru could see out of the corner of his eyes that mothers everywhere were ushering their kids inside. They don't want them to be near him in case he lost his sanity and killed them as well.

"Watch out, it's the murderer," said a man grabbing his little boy and girl; dragging them into the house. No one was on the street anymore. Lights all around him went out and once again he was consumed by darkness. His fists were clenched so hard his knuckles turned white. _I DIDN'T DO IT!_ Then his feet were moving, taking him all the way home.

**Suddenly the light go out**

**Let forever drag me down**

**I will fight for one last breath**

**I will fight until the end**

He ran through the door, ignoring the sign that read Murderer. He slammed the door closed and locked it. Tears were streaming down his face now. He didn't do it and the feeling of being ostracized because of an accusation, hurt worse than being shot in the leg. He wanted to prove he didn't do it but he had no idea how. Then an awful idea emerged from his subconscious. He wasn't going to change what the village thought about him. He would find her and kill her; but only by killing himself would he accomplish killing her. It was settled…his plan started.

**And I will find the enemy within**

**Because I can feel it crawl beneath my skin**

**Dear Agony**

**Just let go of me**

**Suffer slowly**

**Is this the way it's got to be?**

She will show her face to him soon. Her mission wasn't one hundred percent complete. She hadn't killed him and he knew she would be back to finish what she started and when that time comes, he'll be waiting; with a little surprise for her.  
_Wait for me mother, you will soon see your baby…and father I know you won't be fond of my idea but I know you will be proud. _

**Don't bury me**

**Faceless enemy**

**I'm so sorry**

**Is this the way it's got to be?**

**Dear Agony**

He was waiting up for her every night; sleeping only during the day. Never leaving his house until the one night she finally decided to grace him with her presence. Silently she slid through an open window he purposefully left open, unaware that she had fallen right into his trap. Once her feet touched the ground she couldn't move; he had full control over her. In his eyes, she was already dead.

"So you finally decided to come back and finish what you started, huh?" he said in a voice full of malice. Her fear ridden eyes landed on him as he emerged from within the darkness. They narrowed into slits the moment they saw him.

"You little brat, too bad I didn't finish you off back then when I took care of your parents," she said lowering her voice trying to sound menacing. He just smiled, knowing what was coming next.

"Too bad you can't finish it on your own," he said lifting his hand to grab a knife that was sitting on a table next to him. To her surprise she did exactly what he did. She grabbed the knife that was sitting on a table next to her. Her eyes widened.

"W-what's happening?" she asked, looking back at Shikamaru. He smiled and started to explain.

"Your in my shadow possession jutsu, so what ever I do, you do as well…this is how your going to die," he said holding the knife and pointing it at his heart. She gasped as she did the same.

"You idiot, if I die then you die too," she said trying to reason with him. He lowered his head.

"I know," was all he said before jabbing the knife into his arm. He gritted his teeth to stop himself from screaming out in pain. He smiled when he heard her piercing cry. He looked up. Her face had paled along with his. They were both sweating.

"Now it's time to end this…I will avenge mother and father!" he said taking the knife in his left hand and stabbing right where her heart should be. She mirrored him; the knife went through her heart, leaving him with a large wound just below his right shoulder. He heard her choke and her gurgling bloody cries died off. She was dead.

He just lay there, severely injured. He did it.

**Leave me alone**

**God let me go**

**I'm blue and cold**

**Black sky will burn**

**Love pull me down**

**Hate lift me up**

**Just turn around**

**There's nothing left**

He did it. He finally avenged his family. He lay there, motionless. His face was almost as pale as a piece of paper. His lips felt cold and they had a tint of blue. He knew he was dying and it was painful; to leave the beautiful world he knew for an unknown place that might not even exist. He didn't care…he would soon be with his mother and father, laughing and strolling in the meadows like they use to when he was a kid.

**Somewhere far beyond this world**

**I feel nothing anymore**

He closed his eyes and awaited death. He welcomed it with open arms.

**Dear Agony**

**Just let go of me**

**Suffer slowly**

**Is this the way it's got to be?**

**Don't bury me**

**Faceless Enemy**

**I'm so sorry**

**Is this the way it's got to be?**

**Dear Agony**

Shikamaru lifted the hand that gripped the knife and sent a silent prayer up to his parents. _Please come and find me…mom and dad…I love you and miss you._ He then plunged the knife deep into his heart; silencing it forever.

At that moment the lonely and misunderstood Shikamaru died with the hint of smile still present on his cold, lifeless, blue lips. He was finally with his parents; living 'life' the way he thinks he was meant to, carelessly.

**I feel nothing anymore**

_**Please Review! This was my first one shot combined with a song!**_

**_Song: Dear Agony by Breaking Benjamin_**


End file.
